David Brooks and David Frum have a new companion in the crowd of policy experts rushing to endorse the new era of Big Government.
Thaddeus G. McCotter reports in the American Spectator:
Breaking his half-a-millennium media silence from eternal damnation, Fyodor Dostoevskyâ€™s Grand Inquisitor joined a chorus of presumed conservatives to endorse President Obamaâ€™s health care reforms.
Resplendently stooped beneath a banner reading â€œEnslave, But Feed Us!â€ the Grand Inquisitor commenced with a veiled shot at former President Bush: â€œThe present fate of men may be summed up in three words: unrest, confusion, and misery! The bulk of humanity could never be happy under the old system, it is not for them.â€
Inspired that Obama has made government capable of â€œsaving mankind a millennium of useless suffering on earth,â€ the Grand Inquisitor averred that â€œonly now has it become possible to us, for the first time, to give a serious thought to human happiness.â€ …
He was compelled to endorse the Obama plan because it matches his core principles for social justice: â€œThere are three Powers upon earth, capable of conquering the conscience of these weak rebelsâ€”menâ€”for their own good; and these forces are Miracle, Mystery, and Authority.â€
Legendary as a master of abstruse statutory interpretation, the Grand Inquisitor praised the Obama planâ€™s specifics. â€œReceiving their bread from us, they will clearly see that we take the bread from them, the bread made by their own hands, but to give it back to them in equal shares. They will be only too glad to have it so.â€
Regarding the dicey issue of patientsâ€™ choices, the Grand Inquisitor was dismissive. â€œOh, never, never, will they learn to feed themselves without our help! No science will ever give them bread so long as they remain free, so long as they refuse to lay that freedom at our feet.â€ The goal, he said, was to find a universal health care plan â€œall others will believe in, and consent to bow down to in a mass.â€
He said he empathized with the burden Obama selflessly carries upon his strapping shoulders. He urged critics to find common ground, but the grizzled visage lashed out at a Fox News reporter: â€œYou have no right to add one syllable to that which was already uttered before!â€ The wizened wag then subtly positioned Republicans as the party of â€œnoâ€ in the health care debate by deriding its plans for patient-centered health care: â€œThey have saved but themselves while we have saved all.â€
Hat tip to Tristyn Bloom and Will Wilson.