30 Dec 2012

Who Exactly Is Piers Morgan?

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There’s been a considerable negative American reaction to another snot-nosed, whingeing Pom journalist injecting himself into the center of a domestic American Constitutional debate. In response to Piers Morgan’s on-line abuse of American’s Second Amendment rights, a White House petition calling for Morgan’s immediate deportation was created which has accumulated over 90,000 signatures in the course of a few days.

After Morgan bullied and abused the elderly and overly-well-mannered Larry Pratt on television, the more combative Ted Nugent got himself invited to appear on Morgan’s show, where he wound up inviting Piers Morgan to kiss his ass.

Morgan responded yesterday, threatening that, if we Americans failed to enact British-style gun confiscation and civilian disarmament, he might deport himself.

If you don’t change your gun laws to at least try to stop this relentless tidal wave of murderous carnage, then you don’t have to worry about deporting me.

Although I love the country as a second home and one that has treated me incredibly well, I would, as a concerned parent first – and latterly, of a one-year-old daughter who may attend an American elementary school like Sandy Hook in three years’ time – seriously consider deporting myself.

Let’s hope devotely that he does.

Who, by the way, is Piers Morgan?

Piers Morgan is a former British tabloid editor who was fired, and escorted out of his own paper’s building by security, in 2004 for publishing faked photographs showing British troops torturing Iraqi prisoners.

In the same period, Piers Morgan provoked the wrath of Top Gear‘s colorful automotive critic Jeremy Clarkson by prying into Clarkson’s private life and insulting his wife.

Clarkson evidently responded by tipping a glass of water into Morgan’s lap during the last flight of the Concorde, and finally by punching him in the face three times during a British Press Awards dinner in 2004.

Although Wikipedia says the Clarkson-Morgan feud ended in 2006, Jeremy Clarkson has commented on the Piers Morgan affair on Twitter:

One Feedback on "Who Exactly Is Piers Morgan?"


Imaginary conversation between Steve Jobs and Piers Snivel from the marketing department at Apple.

Piers: Steve, we’ve got to add hand-writing recognition software to the iPad and iPhone. Our research tells us that people are frustrated with that on-screen keyboard typing. They want it to be easier.

Jobs: You’re right. It’s rather a pain. I like the idea. How have you tested this software? What does it cost?

Piers: Well, we tested it at some length. It didn’t really perform very well. Didn’t seem to actually solve the problem that people had. And it increases the cost of the iPhone by $25. But, Steve, people REALLY like the idea of handwriting as a solution. They’re clamoring for it. What difference does it make if it doesn’t actually solve their problem and it costs them more? It’s a cool feature and you’ll get kudos for doing it.

Jobs: Get the f**k out of my office.


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