23 Dec 2009

“It’s a Wonderful Bill”

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Iowahawk turns his inimitable talents to a new version of the classic holiday movie updating it a bit.

George and Clarence walk by empty welfare centers and boarded-up ACORN offices

CLARENCE
You see George, Bedford Falls is a mighty different place without you in Washington.

GEORGE BAILEY
I guess what they say is right – one man can make a difference. Clarence, but what about the heath care bill? The health care bill, Clarence!

CLARENCE
You weren’t there to vote for cloture, George. It died in committee. America never got its healthcare bill, and Bedford Falls never got that Federal Snow Museum.

GEORGE BAILEY
Take me to Doc Bradford’s medical clinic Clarence! I wanna see what happened!

CLARENCE
But George, I don’t think you’ll want to see it, it’s just…

GEORGE BAILEY
Take me there Clarence! Take me, darn it! I wanna see it, see?

CLARENCE
Sigh. Alright, as you wish.

Inside Doc Bradford’s clinic

DOC BRADFORD
That was quite a nasty spill you took on the ice, Mrs. Foster. I’m scheduling you for an artificial hip replacement Tuesday. In the meantime, stay off your feet and fill this prescription for pain relievers.

GEORGE BAILEY
Just like that? What about getting approval from the hip procedure rationing board?

CLARENCE
There is no rationing board, George. It’s completely up to Doc and Mrs. Foster.

MRS. FOSTER
Oh, bother. How much is this going to cost me?

DOC BRADFORD
Medicare will pick up most of it, but looks like you’ll have a $200 deductible.

MRS. FOSTER
Well I guess I always can skip my AARP dues.

Read the whole thing.

Hat tip to Karen L. Myers.

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