Sunday night’s episode of The Simpsons, “Caper Chase,†ridiculed the “highly-entitled wusses†that attend America’s universities.
When Mr. Burns tries to endow a Department of Nuclear Plant Management at his alma mater, Yale University, he comes face to face with the horror that is today’s college campus: easily offended, politically correct students overdosed with a hatred for micro-aggressions and cultural appropriation with a need for safe spaces.
Mr. Burns- I’d like to endow a Department of Nuclear Plant Management.
Male Yale Representative- Wonderful. Of course we can’t do nuclear.
Female Yale Representative – Our students are highly-entitled wusses.
Male Yale Representative – You’d be creating a space for violence to happen. How about funding a chair in the non-narrative cinema of self-identified pan-sexuals?
Mr. Burns- What? What? What? What? What?!
Female Yale Representative – We also need to hire more deans to decide which Halloween costumes are appropriate.
Male Yale Representative – Eight deans should do it.
Mr. Burns- (Sputters) Is this still a coven of capitalism where evil money can acquire a patina of virtue?
Male Yale Representative – Yes, that’s in our charter.
Female Yale Representative – But with an issue as hetero-patriarchal as nuclear power, we’ll have to hire multicultural empathizers, build a new safe space.
College Student- Not so fast. We insist on a chair of anti-nuclear studies and a nuclear-neutral curriculum pathway.
Male Yale Representative – Absolutely, Teddy. We run all decisions past the squash team.
College Student- Also the fencing team, water polo and Handsome Dan the mascot.
Mascot- (Goofy laughter)
Mr. Burns- Release me, you hound.
Mascot- (Goofy laughter) Oh, yeah.
Mr. Burns- What’s happened to this place? (Gasps) (Gasps) This was the home of ruthless media disruptor Samuel F.B. Morse. Who’s his successor? That fellow?
College Student- “Fellow”? That word is cis-gender-normative, okay? You’re worse than Hitler!
Mr. Burns- Too late for flattery. I’m not giving this school a dime.
…
The Simpsons was explicit in its parody of Yale students, even using an exact quote from a student.
Mr. Burns learns that the PC-obsession has reached all corners of the university as he meets a few recently fired professors, including one professor who was fired for celebrating Columbus Day and another who referred to God as “He.â€
Later in the episode, Homer must disrupt a man’s scheme to place robot-students in colleges in order to receive tax-payer funded student loans. Upon leaving a gender-neutral bathroom, Homer comes up with a plan to sabotage the robots by offending them.
Hat tip to classmate Seattle Sam.