Janet Napolitano’s Romance novel stolen by Wikileaks.

Please accept with no obligation implied or explicit,

my best wishes for an environmentally conscious,

socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive,

gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday,

practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the

religious persuasion of your choice, with respect for the

religious / secular persuasion and/or traditions of others,

or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and

medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset

of the generally accepted calendar year 2010,

but not without due respect for the calendars of choice

of other cultures whose contributions to society and science

have helped to make America great. Not to imply that America

is or is not greater than any other country,

nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere.

These wishes are made without regard to the race, creed,

color, age, physical ability, education, religious faith,

political affiliation or sexual preference of the wishee.

These wishes are intended for the sole pleasure of the intended addressee,

and is not for re-distribution or resale.

Please destroy after expiration date.

…and may all your batteries be included.

Please Read Carefully:

I MAKE NO REPRESENTATIONS OR WARRANTIES, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED,

REGARDING THESE WISHES (INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO ABILITY TO PERFORM,

VULNERABILITY, CONTENT, AND/OR INCOME), AND ANY OTHER SERVICE PROVIDED BY ME HEREUNDER,

INCLUDING, WITHOUT LIMITATION, ANY IMPLIED WARRANTY OF FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE

AND IMPLIED WARRANTIES ARISING FROM A COURSE OF DEALING OR COURSE OF PERFORMANCE.

I EXPRESSLY DISCLAIM ANY REPRESENTATION OR WARRANTY REGARDING THE PERFORMANCE,

AVAILABILITY, FUNCTIONALITY, OR ANY OTHER ASPECT OF MYSELF.

I WILL NOT BE LIABLE FOR ANY INTERRUPTIONS OR ERRORS, MEDICAL CONDITION, FAMILY HISTORY, OR RELATIVES;

NOR WILL I BE RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY CHILDREN PRODUCED AS A RESULT OF THESE WISHES.

———————-

Hat tip to Matthew Klein.

Taiwan Animated News:

Hat tip to Leah Libresco.

Buck Howdy’s song tribute to the TSA.

Via Theo.

When public policies begin attracting this kind of ridicule and bitter satire from the general population, intelligent leaders would change the policies. The American establishment, e.g., both Bush & Obama, cannot produce intelligent leaders anymore as our educational system is far more successful at inculcating self-confidence and self-entitlement on the basis of the credentials it issues than it is at inculcating common sense. American leaders don’t listen to the people; they listen to credentialed, well-qualified advisers and commentators who, chances are, have their heads equally up the very same place.

Hat tip to Ann Althouse via Matador Network.

Wonder-Tonic:

John Pistole, the head of the Transportation Security Administration, announced yesterday that full body scanners at airports across the nation will be seamlessly integrated with Facebook next month, allowing travelers to save, tag, and share their near-naked security photos with friends, family, and co-workers through the popular social networking site.

Hat tip to Walter Olson.

Our liberal rulers are preparing warning labels for cigarette packages to save us from ourselves.

DirectorBlue argues that warning labels on voting machines and ballots would be more to the point.

Hat tip to the News Junkie.

“It is important that I go to Yale. They have Harold Bloom.”

Hat tip to Matt McLean and Emmy Chang.